A familiar feeling

I'm antsy for things that I can't put my finger on. Like I want to go do something or be somewhere, and somehow I am still sitting here. Typing. The time is ticking before our little time bomb goes off in April, and then my world will change forever. I'm under no allusions here. Motherhood is going to be very different from "wifehood", which was very different from "singlehood". If these aren't words, they should be. I had this anstsy"ness" before I got married, because the "time bomb" was going off which meant a life change was about to happen, and so I had to do something crazy in the time I had left. Yes, "had left". If you gasp here, and think " what a horrible way to think of it.. time left'" then I think less of you.

Of course the start of something new means the end of something old. It's accurate.

Right now, I am thinking the "new" will involve great things, but in and among the great will be the reality of a dependent child. A tiny, little infant, who poops, and cries, and demands that I care for it (he/she) constantly. An awesome, scary, real responsibility.

And before I buckle down and get serious about being a mom, I am just letting you know that I am feeling antsy. I have four months left.

The feeling is not a new one for me. I know that. I'm a restless person, and so I learn to cope when I'm in these moods. Time to review my inventory of past coping strategies, so I can take my pick for the night.

1) Puddle jump

2) Run--fast.

3) Play a game of "21 up"

4) Go to South Africa

5) Go to England, Scotland, Ireland, Italy

6) Come home

7) Pull out my list of "dreams" and add to it

8) Get lost in a good book

9) Go to Petland

10) Climb a tree

11) Build a fort

12) Tackle James

13) Yell and make noises

14) Go outside

15) Drink a pint.

Ok, so there's a few on the least that aren't all that feasible. I think I'll just go grab my book.